![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Tell Me Lies
Sep. 4th, 2003 03:55 amI woke up yesterday with a cold that had been trying to grab ahold of me since before the convention. It's not been too bad, mostly just my voice coming and going, fevers off and on, and of course, needing to take naps at the worst times!
It's around 3:30 in the morning, and I really can't sleep. I had a lot of serious stuff hit me in the last couple of days regarding Dragon*Con. It's all confidential, at least for now, but it doesn't change the fact that it's hard stuff to deal with.
Sometimes I wonder if "confidential" isn't just another word for "secret".
The people that do know about this stuff, and that I can talk to about it, aren't the kind of people I can call at 3:30 in the morning because I am upset over it. Most of them would say it is out of my hands now, there's no sense in fretting over it. And while that's probably true, I don't know. Maybe it's the whole "secret" part of it that's really getting to me.
I grew up with more secrets than most people hear in a lifetime. Once I grew up, I decided that secrets on a whole were definately detrimental to the health of the individual trying to keep them. I suppose that's why I have become an open book. This doesn't mean I run around telling everyone everything about me, but it does mean that when people ask me about things that were once deemed "secrets I should never tell", I don't lie about them.
I have a lot on my mind, things that I was hoping I could just put aside until the Senior Director's Meeting in October. All the things that have hit me like a runaway freight train have made that impossible. I am trying to type up a word document to both purge my system and to insure that I don't forget anything important when we do go to the meeting.
I don't know how I feel about Dragon*Con becoming a 24/7 part of my life.
It's putting a bit of a wall in my creative thought flow.
Maybe it's all part of the post-con depression.
Anyway, back to typing up reports.
It's around 3:30 in the morning, and I really can't sleep. I had a lot of serious stuff hit me in the last couple of days regarding Dragon*Con. It's all confidential, at least for now, but it doesn't change the fact that it's hard stuff to deal with.
Sometimes I wonder if "confidential" isn't just another word for "secret".
The people that do know about this stuff, and that I can talk to about it, aren't the kind of people I can call at 3:30 in the morning because I am upset over it. Most of them would say it is out of my hands now, there's no sense in fretting over it. And while that's probably true, I don't know. Maybe it's the whole "secret" part of it that's really getting to me.
I grew up with more secrets than most people hear in a lifetime. Once I grew up, I decided that secrets on a whole were definately detrimental to the health of the individual trying to keep them. I suppose that's why I have become an open book. This doesn't mean I run around telling everyone everything about me, but it does mean that when people ask me about things that were once deemed "secrets I should never tell", I don't lie about them.
I have a lot on my mind, things that I was hoping I could just put aside until the Senior Director's Meeting in October. All the things that have hit me like a runaway freight train have made that impossible. I am trying to type up a word document to both purge my system and to insure that I don't forget anything important when we do go to the meeting.
I don't know how I feel about Dragon*Con becoming a 24/7 part of my life.
It's putting a bit of a wall in my creative thought flow.
Maybe it's all part of the post-con depression.
Anyway, back to typing up reports.
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif){kind=small}
