Tell Me Lies
Sep. 4th, 2003 03:55 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
cassy_gI woke up yesterday with a cold that had been trying to grab ahold of me since before the convention. It's not been too bad, mostly just my voice coming and going, fevers off and on, and of course, needing to take naps at the worst times!
It's around 3:30 in the morning, and I really can't sleep. I had a lot of serious stuff hit me in the last couple of days regarding Dragon*Con. It's all confidential, at least for now, but it doesn't change the fact that it's hard stuff to deal with.
Sometimes I wonder if "confidential" isn't just another word for "secret".
The people that do know about this stuff, and that I can talk to about it, aren't the kind of people I can call at 3:30 in the morning because I am upset over it. Most of them would say it is out of my hands now, there's no sense in fretting over it. And while that's probably true, I don't know. Maybe it's the whole "secret" part of it that's really getting to me.
I grew up with more secrets than most people hear in a lifetime. Once I grew up, I decided that secrets on a whole were definately detrimental to the health of the individual trying to keep them. I suppose that's why I have become an open book. This doesn't mean I run around telling everyone everything about me, but it does mean that when people ask me about things that were once deemed "secrets I should never tell", I don't lie about them.
I have a lot on my mind, things that I was hoping I could just put aside until the Senior Director's Meeting in October. All the things that have hit me like a runaway freight train have made that impossible. I am trying to type up a word document to both purge my system and to insure that I don't forget anything important when we do go to the meeting.
I don't know how I feel about Dragon*Con becoming a 24/7 part of my life.
It's putting a bit of a wall in my creative thought flow.
Maybe it's all part of the post-con depression.
Anyway, back to typing up reports.
It's around 3:30 in the morning, and I really can't sleep. I had a lot of serious stuff hit me in the last couple of days regarding Dragon*Con. It's all confidential, at least for now, but it doesn't change the fact that it's hard stuff to deal with.
Sometimes I wonder if "confidential" isn't just another word for "secret".
The people that do know about this stuff, and that I can talk to about it, aren't the kind of people I can call at 3:30 in the morning because I am upset over it. Most of them would say it is out of my hands now, there's no sense in fretting over it. And while that's probably true, I don't know. Maybe it's the whole "secret" part of it that's really getting to me.
I grew up with more secrets than most people hear in a lifetime. Once I grew up, I decided that secrets on a whole were definately detrimental to the health of the individual trying to keep them. I suppose that's why I have become an open book. This doesn't mean I run around telling everyone everything about me, but it does mean that when people ask me about things that were once deemed "secrets I should never tell", I don't lie about them.
I have a lot on my mind, things that I was hoping I could just put aside until the Senior Director's Meeting in October. All the things that have hit me like a runaway freight train have made that impossible. I am trying to type up a word document to both purge my system and to insure that I don't forget anything important when we do go to the meeting.
I don't know how I feel about Dragon*Con becoming a 24/7 part of my life.
It's putting a bit of a wall in my creative thought flow.
Maybe it's all part of the post-con depression.
Anyway, back to typing up reports.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 09:26 am (UTC)Just remember that we made it through to the other side. I am not sure quite HOW that happened...but the fact is that we made it.
There was definately something in the air this year...and I can't quite put my finger on it. But you and yours did a fantastic job YET AGAIN. Thank you!
Just remember...we have 350 plus days until we descend into the belly of the beast again.
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 01:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 02:18 pm (UTC)Must prepare for descent to hell!
heh yea, I am a wee bit silly today. :P
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 02:16 pm (UTC)As always, Tech rocked, and I loved, absolutely loved the slide shows. From what I have heard drifting around the rumor stream, you had a lot to do with those getting made.
Thanks for all the hard work you and the rest of the crew put in every year. We'd be lost without our Tech Ops!
(Oh and without pie, heh)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 02:45 pm (UTC)The movie shorts were done by Brian Richardson and Patrick Freeman. Both are staffers for us. I shudder to think at the amount of time Patrick spent working on that stuff.
I was pretty much a sounding board. I watched...gave ideas and critiques but they did all the work. I was moral support...humor monger...and all around nice guy.
We are coming back next year with bigger and better. There are going to be more slides...more mockumentaries...more everything. We are planning on having enough material so that anytime there is a blank screen and projector we can put stuff up.
All of this years work is being burned to DVD. I will make sure that you get a copy once it is completed.
I just wish that Amy, Patrick, Brian, and Lucas would have gotten more recognition for the hundreds and hundreds of hours of work that they put into it. We started that project 2 months before con started.
This year we will have ALL YEAR. Think of the damage that we can do.
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 03:08 pm (UTC)Thank you, thank you, thank you!
I wish they had gotten more recognition too. All of their work was absolutely incredible!
By the way, it scares me to think what they will do with a year to work on things! I can't WAIT!
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 03:11 pm (UTC)eviloompa at bellsouth dot net
I need your help.
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 02:51 pm (UTC)I was jumping through my ass the entire weekend.
But Marsters and Voltaire made it all worthwhile...that and getting into the pit at Godhead. That helped take out some frustration ;)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 03:10 pm (UTC)I haven't heard the final numbers either, but I wouldn't say I feel that you are wrong in your assessment.
Voltaire is an amazing performer. I have loved watching him ever since his first visit to Dragon*Con, ack, many years ago.
Yea, MOSH PIT! Wish I could have been there. :)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 01:45 pm (UTC)He wore his hair over his ears at all times so that none could see them. Every year when he had his hair cropped he selected on boy to do it and put the boy to death.
One year the mother of a boy who had been selected to crop Labra's hair pleaded desperately with him to spare her son, although she knew not of Labra's deformity. He agreed, but made the boy swear an oath to keep the secret. The boy did so and he and his mother were told to leave the kingdom for both parties' best interest.
The boy was struck with fever shortly thereafter and slowly started to deteiorate. His panic-stricken mother sought out the help of a druid who told her "'tis the secret that is killing him" and instructed her son to wander along the road and tell the secret to the first yew tree he finds.
The boy does so and is alleviated of his strange disease.
However, a few years later a bard is wandering along that same road and, deciding this yew tree to be the perfect tree from which to make a harp, fashions a magnificent harp from that very same tree.
Shortly after this the bard arrives in Labra's kingdom and is treated with great hospitality and is asked to recite a story after they have feasted. The bard does so, but as his fingers pluck the cords the boy's voice rings out in the room, telling Labra's secret.
It had come from the harp!
The people look to Labra, who had always been a fair, just and well-liked chieftain, and realizing the error of his ways he stands up and pulls his hair back to reveal his ears, expecting the worse. Instead, the people cheer loudly (recognizing the bravery of their king) and from the moment on there were no secrets in his kingdom, and no more young barbers were put to death.
I just thought this story might be of some avail to you given the above post pertaining to secrets. Sometimes there are secrets that should never be kept and cause great harm to us and others to keep. The truth always has a way of rising to the surface.
Anyway, I hope this atleast entertained if it did not lend itself to introspection and a different perspective. >=)
no subject
Date: 2003-09-04 02:14 pm (UTC)This particular confidential thing isn't really hurtful to me in particular. I mean, I am not even directly involved. However, it has been brought to me, therefore it is now a problem for me. Further, being highly responsible and concerned for people in general, I am wondering if the things I have helped put into motion will be enough to help the persons that are directly affected.
Ok, that made no sense. I think I will just go with, thank you so much. And *many hugs*.